Do you ever feel like your husband is an absolute mystery? This personality-type can be alluring at first, but with time it may leave you scratching your head and wondering: “How does he feel about me?”
It is often said that women love to verbalize their love, while men like to show it in other ways. If you’re feeling like your hubby isn’t as verbal as you might like him to be with his affections, don’t despair. There are secret signs you can read that show how he is really feeling about his happy married life.
From defending their honor to tickling their legs, men have their own ways of expressing love and devotion to women – and not all of them are crystal clear to the women in their lives!
The eight indirect ways that men show their love to women
1. He Builds Intimacy
When it comes to love in marriage, there is nothing more important than establishing an intimate connection to your spouse.
Intimacy is so much more than getting physical with your spouse. It’s about creating an emotional and physical bond.
You will know that your husband is expressing affection when he goes out of his way to communicate with you when he is feeling uneasy.
He will share goals, thoughts, feelings, and physical affection with you and he isn’t afraid to be vulnerable.
These are wonderful qualities to have in a husband that will assure you of his love for you.
2. He Defends You
It goes without saying that a man who loves his wife would never disrespect her to his friends or family.
Saying things about your cooking, cleaning, work-ethic, or sexual habits are completely off-limits in his mind. The only person he wants to discuss these things with is you.
Want to know how deep love and marriage really go in your husband’s mind? One secret way men show love is by defending you.
3. He Invites You Out
Men value their personal time with ‘the guys’. This is the evening they get to connect with friends, watch sports, play video games, and have a couple of drinks.
These are all pastimes that are healthy for your husband to pursue on his own. However, one secret way he’ll show his love for you is if he invites you out to a ‘guys night’ event. This means that not even a beer-swilling evening with the guys is worth missing out on spending time with you.
This same principle works if he is heading out to spend time with his close family and invites you along.
By extending the invitation for you to hang out with the people he loves the most, you can be sure that you make the top of that list.
4. He Gives His Time
One of the most precious things anyone can give you is their time and their undivided attention.
In fact, getting someone’s attention without a cell phone notification getting in the way may be considered ‘true love’ these days.
Jokes aside, when your husband loves you he will want to give you his time and affection – no matter what the situation.
If you’re heading out for a walk around the block or to pick up a few groceries, he’s down to go with you. If he has a night off, there is no doubt that he wants to spend it with you. This is the sign of real love from your man.
5. He Picks Up Girly Things
Want to know about true love and marriage? If your husband has a happy married life he won’t mind picking up your laundry list of ‘girly’ items from the store.
These embarrassing grocery lists may include having him buy bathroom wipes, girly deodorant, picking up the dry-cleaning, shopping for ‘unmentionable’ feminine hygiene products, or fetching your birth control.
No matter the embarrassing item, your husband is willing to risk a tinge of public unease just to make you happy. Now that’s love.
6. He Can Apologize
Apologies can be powerful. Whether you’re discussing who left the toilet seat up or why your sweetheart didn’t call you like they promised, a simple apology can do so much to diffuse a situation. It’s a way of showing respect and empathy and acknowledging wrongdoing.
Husbands who love their wives show it by apologizing when they are wrong (and hey, sometimes when he’s right!) because they put their spouse’s feelings above an argument.
This is a wonderful quality to have in a partner and shows just how much he loves you.
7. He Asks for your Advice
One of the sweetest ways a guy can show he loves and values his wife is by asking for her help and her advice on a matter. This means he values your thoughts, feelings, and intelligence enough to use it as a guidepost for any issues he’s having.
Men are often considered ‘fixers’. Whether it’s his wife’s hurt feelings or the broken door handle, men go into a problem with the intent of fixing it as soon as possible.
Men can also be proud by nature, which makes him coming to you for advice the ultimate sign that not only does he love you, but he deeply respects your opinions.
8. He Listens
Is there anything sexier than a man who listens? Some say that men fall short when it comes to listening. From squabbles with her friends to which leggings are her favorite, husband’s who love their wives will listen to whatever is on their minds.
Sometimes men can be hard to read, even if that man is your husband! It’s important to remember that men and women show their love in different ways.
If your husband is always willing to give you his time, works hard at building intimacy, and respects your opinions, you can be sure he loves you dearly.
- My woman, real woman, ambitious woman, number 1 in category, loving you is an understatement, girl future will tell.
- I will never stop dreaming because you are my dream nor stop hoping because you are my hope, girl I will never stop loving because you are my LOVE.
- I use to be a player till I met you, you changed the game and now im in love.
- I woke up few minute ago and I felt incomplete then I remembered I haven’t talked with my second half, love you.
- I am very indecisive and always have trouble picking my favorite anything. But, without a doubt, you are my favorite everything.
“Wiiiiiieeeeeeennnn, wieeeeeeeeeeeeeeen, wieeeeeennnnnennnn” my baby’s cry geared on and on.
“Jesus, please stop her. Please calm her down. What do I know is wrong with her now?” I kept muttering to myself as I sat up and held my three month old baby in my arm. She was crying profusely.
Tears dotted her face like little puddles of water. She doesn’t want to be appeased. She refused to be breastfed too. What shall I do?
I climbed down the bed and danced around while singing lullabies for her but instead of being appeased, Blossom kept crying.
“Is it her diapers?” I asked myself. I went to her wardrobe and brought out another diaper. I went back to the bed, sat down, removed all of her clothes and off I set to the bathroom.
After giving Blossom a warm bath, I came back to the bedroom to dress her in another light, comfortable sleeper after applying sufficient powder on her body and enough oil on her scalp. Yet, the cry continued. I was frustrated.
I brought her close to my bosom as I raised my blouse but her little hands pulled my blouse down meaning “I don’t want your jugs!” She cried the more!
We were in the hospital that very day before for the ante-natal. The last vaccination was not like this o! Though she cried it was not as bad as this. This incessant cry, I have been told to anticipate but I didn’t expect it would be this much. I eased the blouse she was wearing and checked her small shoulder which was the ‘venue’ for the substance causing my baby’s discomfort. I rubbed it over and over again. She cried the more. I put my baby down, knelt beside my bed and cried!
Is this how motherhood thing is? God, this is unbearable! I cried and cried.
You might be thinking, where is your husband? Is your baby fatherless? My dear people, no! My husband is alive,. He is safe and sound.
All the while the drama unfolded, Dave slept so beautifully as if nothing was happening. My baby’s tears and my own- everything was in his ears like lullabies urging him to sleep on.
This was not the man I married!
When I just got married to him, my sleeplessness made him sleepless. When I turned on my side on the bed, he would wake up, no matter how deep his sleep was. He would cuddle me and sing into my ears till I fall I asleep but now, he just didn’t bulge.
He turned in his sleep and sat up. I looked at him and shook my head.
“Dear, are you just…” I was saying when he shut me up.
“What’s the noise about?” He asked, still very sleep-drunk.
I looked at him very intensely, my heart beat rising so fast. Can’t he see my tears? Can’t he see that I need a word of encouragement?
“Are you crying?” he asked, yawning, scratching his head and looking away. My already swollen heart ripped open that I cried aloud.
“Dave, where are you? What is happening? Where is my husband? What has happened to us?” I cried on and on. He shook his head, let out a brief hiss, came down from the bed, picked up a pillow and out of the room he went!
My cry stopped abruptly!
“Is this a dream?” I asked myself
I couldn’t hold it anymore. I tucked my already dozing baby in her small cradle and jumped out of the room as if being pursued by a jackal!
Dave was on the settee, supporting himself with the pillow and some other throw pillows. He was snoring! He looked so unbothered.
One spirit told me to slap him awake, the other told me ‘Liz, take things easy’ I obeyed the latter, walked close to him, knelt down beside him and tapped him.
“Ohhh, Liz, what’s it? Its midnight. Sleep! If not, let me sleep!” he said.
‘I won’t cry!’ I told myself. I called my Spirit, Soul and Body to let’s fight the battle together.
“Dave, what’s wrong? You couldn’t hear Blossom crying so heavily. Could you?”
“Of course I could. But you know, cuddle her, sing to her, do everything. She would sleep”
“yes, I have tried everything but they didn’t work. I think it’s the vaccination that is the cause.”
“Well, if it didn’t work when the mother tried all, would it work if I tried? Liz, try to be reasonable!” He said. I blinked so hard to avoid my tears from falling.
“You could still show care Dave. You are supposed to show me care” My eyes failed me as I started crying again. Dave hissed!
“See Liz, this cry is irritating! Grow up! What’s the difference between you and Blossom? When a grown up tries to behave like a baby, she becomes an imbecile!” he blurted out. I sat on the cold tiles, picked one of the throw pillows and I started banging it on the floor thinking the experience would wake me up from my slumber. I felt a sharp headache.
“Dave, I have lost you! Jesus, I have lost my husband!” I cried out over and over again.
Our marriage is only a year old. What is happening? Those times when I was pregnant and I was acting a kid that was sobbing, he would cuddle me and call me “my baby with my baby” while he wiped my tears. Now, this isn’t even an act and it irritated him. It didn’t pain him, it didn’t concern him! What has suddenly come over him?
He had been behaving weird and absurd for many days now but now it’s getting out of hand.
I went close to him and sat beside him. I held his hand which he reluctantly allowed. I sighed at this.
“Dave, please, let’s pray. I can sense that something is wrong.” I said. He threw my hands away, hissed and stood up.
“Don’t bring in prayers into something like this. Why are you being illogical? If you can’t let me be, I will leave the house for you” he said, wore his slip-ons and walked towards the door.
As he was about to open, I blocked him.
Where is he going to? It’s just few minutes to midnight. This night? God forbid!” I thought to myself.
I looked into his face and my heart yearned for my husband, but his eyes scared me. They were red as burning coals. My heart started racing.
I cried out as he caught my right hand and pushed me off his way into one of the arm chairs. It was so painful.
The key turned twice and the door opened. There was a loud bang as he closed the door behind him.
“Jesus! This can’t be your will right? But you told me it is Dave and no one else. That was why I said yes. You did! What’s it now?…Oh God!”
I could cry no more. The veins at the sides of my head were thumping to the extent that the noise disturbed me! My head was banging as if yam was being pounded in it. I was exhausted. My nose was blocked! My eyes were heavy.
Where is my caring, loving, prayerful and peace-loving husband and father of Blossom? It’s obviously not this monster!
Where is my husband? Can someone just tell me his whereabouts?
TO BE CONTINUED…
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